Spinning

No, not like spinning class unfortunately. I’m manic again. I feel like I’m spinning out of control. I’m on a roller coaster and no one will stop the ride and let me off. All I want is to walk. I’ll settle for crawling. I don’t know how to handle this. Two weeks ago I felt this way and two days later I was nearly suicidal. Then the mania came on so fast this morning and I’m panicky about what comes next. I just want to shed my own skin. Instead, I just took a klonopin. Even if all it does is make me a little drowsy and ease up the panicked feeling and anxiety, maybe that will help make the transition a little easier. I just don’t know what else to do at this point. I know from experience if I call my doctor she will tell me the Abilify hasn’t had time to get in my system and remind to what to do in case of emergency. Does anyone really do that???

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